Wednesday, 4 April 2012

D is for the Dice on my Desk and Deliveries

D

Yes, I have this set of dice.  No, they are not the ones on my desk.  I couldn't find a picture of those.
Ah, the dice on my desk.  There they sit, cluttered up with telephone cables, old post-it notes, pencils, tippex bottles, dead lighters, security passes, the wooden penguin I use to hold my headphones, the exciting geode I like to keep there, the mini-stapler, the funny putty, the copy of Sims 3 Pets that broke my computer, my ashtray and all the other paraphenalia of a computerised life.

These are my GMing dice.  As distinct from my player dice.  Those live downstairs.  They even have a bag.  Lucky them.  The desk dice just sit there waiting for the many moments throughout a day when I'll need to roll them. 

Unlike a lot of gamers, I'm not particularly anal about people touching my dice.  This is not reciprocal in the home group.  My rolling is so universally horrible as a player that everyone does their utmost to keep their dice away from me in case I infect them.  I do see their point.

Everyone knows that a die has a finite number of high rolls in it.  If someone borrows your die and rolls well with it, that's one good roll gone.  Everyone also knows that bad luck is contagious.  Don't let the person who spends entire sessions rolling single digits touch your treasured dice.  Particularly don't let them near your lucky d20.  Logically it would make more sense to pass your lucky dice to the unlucky player and get them to use up the stock of horrible rolls for you, but nobody seems to do this. 

Not my study.  Nor my desk.  It looks good though and I've always loved this picture.  Vittore Carpaccio painted it on the wall of the Scuole degli Schiavoni in Venice. 
The desk belonged originally to my grandfather and then later my father.  It's heavy, Victorian and much loved.  I love the fact that it has seen my grandfather planning out his assault on the Derby fruit and vegetable market and my father think his way through the early days of cybernetics.  I love that it has now come to me and I use it in ways grandfather would have loved and my father predicted.


On a random, but irate note, today I must wait in for a delivery.  Joy of joys.  I swear some delivery firms just wait around the corner in their vans, telescopic lens trained on the house to watch for the one moment you are in the loo and can't answer the door.  That is when they hurry past, dropping a  "Sorry you were out" note through the letter box.  Then they drive away laughing, leaving you to negotiate the minefield of automated phone system hell.

"Hi!  We're so glad you have to call us about the enormous box we couldn't put through the door.  Just tap in the 13 digit number at the top of the card and we'll be right with you."

Tap in 13 digit number.  Wait for inevitable cheery "I didn't quite catch that, would you like to try again?"


"Great!  I have some options for you.  To select a new time for your delivery, press 1.  To collect your delivery from our depot, press 2.  To get your delivery delivered to another address, press 3.  To have your delivery destroyed by our special services team, press 4 ..."  

And so on.  At no point does the option "speak to an actual person" appear in all this.

I cannot possibly be the only person who finds this sort of thing drives them into a tooth-gnashing rage.  Support group anyone?


26 comments:

  1. Amanda so nice to meet a fellow gamer
    Hmm the dice no one touches them - ha
    would love for you to take a visit as we are developing our story each day based on the letter (of the day) and the tile that comes up from the game Carcassonne
    kinda like writing a book no one is getting along
    Ladys Knight
    Cheers and Happy A to Z

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  2. ugg my link not as accurate as the role of a die Ladys Knight

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    1. A fun idea and I am now following :) Happy A-Z.

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  3. Love the dice. Very cool and unique. New follower now. Happy A-Z, baby.

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    1. Why thank you :)

      Welcome indeed and I hope you find things to entertain you here.

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  4. 'Everyone knows that a die has a finite number of high rolls in it. If someone borrows your die and rolls well with it, that's one good roll gone.'

    Mind-blown.

    And, yes, the, 'Sorry! Didn't quite catch that,' is far too cheery for what amounts to an automaton filtered through a reverse vocoder.

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    1. Wait - you mean that statement isn't true?

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  5. Love the dice--they give me some great ideas for a fantasy novel for some reason.
    Great A-Z post!
    Nutschell
    www.thewritingnut.com

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    1. Great! I'm loving how this A-Z thing is setting off so many chain reactions.

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  6. Love those dice. I keep my dice with me because they roll way better than all those online dice rollers. Really, they do. I like the idea of giving dice to an unlucky player to get all the bad rolls out, but like you, I've never seen it done.
    I wrote about dice superstitions a while ago, you may enjoy that :)

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    1. Thank you for confirming everything I know about dice. Loved that post.

      Online rollers hate me as well, but at least I chose my own dice and can threaten them with incineration if they don't behave.

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  7. The dice are very cool. I'm glad we don't have to call. They leave a slip on the door we sign. Then they leave the package the next day. Usually.

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    1. This is what always used to happen, but they've suddenly decided to improve the system. Or wreck my mind.

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  8. Now I want to see a picture of the wooden penguin with the headphones on it.

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    1. If I can just find a working camera, your wish will be my command.

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  9. Ugg, don't you just wish you could throw a portal infront of those delivery people, something that would keep them trapped until you can answer the door!

    We've had to hide our dice or the youngest plays with them. Gamer in training who likes to steal dice.

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    1. I do, I really, really do.

      Gamers in training are good. Disappearing dice, not so much. Also, treading on a d4 gives a whole new meaning to pain.

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    2. It's almost as bad as stepping on a piece of lego that the trainee gamer has dropped. We also have to keep him out of the mini's (We live above where we work - we own a small gaming and publishing company- and he tries to play with the space ships if we're not careful)

      The upside is he's not far off being dragged into play testing the new core rule book with us *heh*

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    3. Oooh lego. Don't get me started.

      Luckily, the lego days are past for us. Not so the Magic cards. My worst sin by a lot was to put an entire deck through the washing machine. Very fortunately it was a starter deck and had nothing irreplaceable in it, but still ... Bad Mother Award.

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  10. Your desk sounds amazing! I am envious: mine is just a simple white-painted table that I bought for twenty dollars at a flea market.

    A-Z @ Elizabeth Twist

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    1. Before the desk of deskiness was properly unpacked, I used a board on a couple of boxes full of books. I finally got around to finding all the desk parts when I realised my inpromptu effort was sloping badly due to taking books out of the boxes.

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    2. impromptu.

      Gah. Hate not being able to edit after event.

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  11. I would love to have a family desk - except then again, realizing that I will most likely inherit my father's desk - that means he will be dead when I do so. :( sad thought. And automated phone systems are hellish. I do believe they were invented by the devil. They bring out the worst in me!!

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    1. One of the drawers in the desk still has traces of the smell I most strongly associate with my father - a mixture of TCP and pipe tobacco.

      Automated phone systems would always rank high on any list of pet hates.

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  12. Ah, the dice. I have a beautiful set that looks like blue sea glass. They roll absurdly well; everyone knows that even though there's a finite number of high rolls, beautiful dice roll better.

    Also, I have a rule that anyone who mentions dice gets asked if they've seen this marvelous thing: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54VJWHL2K3I

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    1. Brilliant :D

      Thank you so much for sharing that. I hadn't seen it before.

      Mind you, I was hugely confused by the Marks & Spencers ad that came before the actual video. My excuse is that it's early morning for me.

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